No Phone

I am not someone who is by any means addicted to my phone; but still, I cannot help feeling something akin to mourning for my slim, black, Motorola G that seems to be permanently malfunctioning since it took the plunge from my back pocket into the toilet Tuesday evening between classes at work.  I hate that an innanimate object can make me feel this way, especially since I pride myself on being independant of my mobile phone. 

Truth is, I am probably one of the few people in the modern world who could lose access to her smartphone's "smart" functions for more than 24 hours and not go insane!  I am not one of those people who is constantly looking at her phone, or discreetly answering a Whatsapp message when in the midst of a conversation with a "real" person.  I don't have facebook on my phone. I have a minimum of apps downloaded.  The most used function on my mobile is probably my camera, but for that I have a great new digital camera just over a year old that takes outstanding photos.  So what is it?

The most annoying thing is that my phone just seems to have lost sensibility--it doesn't recognize my touch.  It turns on, off, has a great picture on screen...but I cannot do a single thing with it because it won't recognize my fingers' touch.  Somehow I think I would feel better about things if I had some real buttons to push (or perhaps pound on), but as is I just sit there stroking my phone like someone trying to resucitate a small dead animal!

And what is it that makes me miss my phone's pressence as if had a personality of its own?  The answer, in my opinion might have tinges of science fiction, but I am affraid it is very true.  Technology has become so overwhelmingly important in our lives today that many people sadly spend more time with their phones than with their friends and often even family.  Our self-images are becoming more and more digitalized.  We strive to be original in our profile pictures; we update the backdrop on our phones, personalize ring-tones, and make all manner of small changes so that these little handheld devices of ours begin to refelect who we are or who we want people to think we are.  Losing a phone is like losing a part of ourselves because we have poured so much of our time into making them more than just a device for communication. 

In my case, as I've said, I have fewer technological ties to my phone.  Usually I can't be bothered to do things like personalize ring-tones, nor do I often change my backdrop photo or profile pictures.  All the same, smartphones help us reach a level of communication, or maybe availability for communication, that would otherwise be impossible, even with computers.  With a smartphone we really are 100% connected to the world via internet 100% of the time.  There are drawbacks, of course, but there are great advatages.  What I miss the most by far is the chat group that my family has on Whatsapp.  I miss the witty quips back and forth with my sisters, my mom's pictures and silly emoticons, and my dad's typically taciturn but spot-on observations of the goings on of the women in the family.

So while I am still resentful of my feelings of loss over this little bit of technology, I guess I can be comforted by the reasons behind the feeling afterall.  It's not some digital narcisism, but love of family that makes me miss my phone more than anything else.