Unexpected visits

So today, Sunday, Angelines surprised me with, "today we'll do whatever you want." I guess lately I've been being a pain when it comes to Sunday's mid-day. The thing is, we usually go out for a cervecita at around one and then usually end up getting caught up with the crowd of our friends. In the end we eat out...but I'm not much into bar food. I usually spend the later half of the time thinking about how good my lentil soup would be or a nice big green salad instead of the fried tapas. So I guess I start making faces and it's apparently obvious that I'm no longer having a good time--something Angelines can't handle. Then we either tough it out or she grudgingly pays the bill and we leave before we've eaten too much.

Sound like fun? Not to A either; all the same I was a little surprised this morning when she came out with, "today we'll do whatever you want." ...Later the reason came out and I felt guilty.

Anyhow, I think all's well that ends well because my idea was to head over to a nearby town where one of our good friends lives and surprise her. We'd have a beer or two and then come home to eat. Angelines agreed that it was a good idea since we haven't seen this friend since our Thanksgiving feast.

Today was a beautiful day--freezing cold, but gorgeously sunny. The drive over was lovely except that in conversation it came out that lately I'd been a pain on Sundays (oops!). We got there, ordered a beer, a wine and two tapas, and called Carmen and Nico. She said we should just head up to the house since she was in the middle of making lunch.

So after a tapita, we headed up the hill to her adorable little house and she greeted us at the door saying: "Come on, you're eating here!" Who can turn down the offer of a homecooked meal with friends??? So we stayed for a delicious fish lunch with pineapple and cookies for dessert and a delicious Moroccan tea to finish it all off. :)

Part of my funk lately is that I just don't feel very connected with my friends here. We have a great time out and about, but people in Spain just don't "hang out" American-style together very often (at least not my friends). So while I'm oh so thankful to have them, sometimes I'm left feeling lonesome simply because we don't connect on a deeper level with each other. I think part of it may be due to the fact that public places (read: bars) only lend themselves to certain kinds of interactions, and it might not be so much a personality issue. Anyway, there's a little bit of back-story to my Sunday funkiness.

The trouble is, the people I feel most of a connection to don't live in La Roda (like this friend, for example), or if they do, they're super busy and there's just no time for a quality visit. It makes the day-to-day tough sometimes, when what I really want to do is call up a good friend and watch a movie or go for a walk...

Maybe it's just that I've been so lucky with my friendships that now I'm really particular. I'm not happy just having a casual, good-times, friend; I want someone who's there for it all: the good, the bad, and the ugly. Some of you are probably thinking, "what about Angelines?" Truth is, at this point, I'd say she's my only friend like that here. That's good; but at the same time I think it's important to have other deep relationships outside of a marriage. I really don't think it's possible for one person to fulfill all another's needs; and if it were possible, I don't think it would be fair to ask that of another person.

So there you have it. I'm very happy in my house in my marriage and in my life here, in general. But just like everyone everywhere, I get down sometimes. And the old saying "the grass is always greener..." really couldn't be more true. Sometimes I fantasize about living in Portland; but what kind of a sacrifice would that be for Angelines?

In any case, I think it goes without saying that after an hour and a half of good food and better company, laughing and talking, my mood had turned a 360.

The bottom line: I have just come back from a wonderful, happy, Sunday luncheon with friends. Unexpected/unplanned visits really do usually end up being the best, don't they?